“Dear God — We Almost Lost the Kardashians!”

Just seconds after the accident, Kim Kardashian immediately tweets:

When a truck caused snow to blow over the windshield of a car Khloe Kardashian was driving on an icy road in Montana after a family ski trip outing, the car swerved into oncoming traffic, hit black ice and ended up in a ditch!

Dozens of cops and FBI men surround a plane after a “DRUNKEN, BELLIGERENT WOMAN” is dragged off the plane kicking and screaming for attacking passengers during the flight.  “The Feds take this type of thing very seriously” — yeah, especially when it’s an award-winning FEMALE PORN STAR.