Burt Reynolds Catches The Deadly Norovirus Plague That is Being Spread Around by Dirty Nasty Cruise Ship Vacationers!

Burt Reynolds Scare Story

Screencap from TMZ’s breaking news!

BIOHAZARDFilm star Burt Reynolds, 76, is being treated in the intensive care unit at a Florida hospital … after coming down with a nasty case of the flu.  The flu dehydrated the icon severely after he bravely fought the disease like any man with balls would.  But it got to be too much for even virile, manly Burt.  The flu has spread to every state across the union, with millions sickened and weakened.

SAVE BURT,
YOU BASTARDS!

Burt Reynolds Cosmopolitan Mag 1972

Burt Reynolds’ famous naked spread that made him a star.
How dare the dirty germ spreaders try to KILL him this way!

Some conspiracy theorists wonder if the flu is in fact a biowarfare test carried out by some unknown, draconian bio-warfare laboratory.  Conspiracy theorists claim the extremely virulent flu strain is not common to the natural world and appears to be man-made (see Time Magazine article), just like the HIV virus was.  See Influenza — The Conspiracy Wiki for more.

Disease Ships Troll The Seas

Bad hygiene habits of cruise ship passengers to blame!
The flu is spread by stool feces! Wash your hands after you wipe your ass, you filthy, unclean heathens!

Vile cruise-ship infected vacationers are the ones spreading the Norovirus (also called “the cruise ship flu”) to the rest of us!  Get these ships off the seas! WE must protest to stop further cruise ship vacations at once!

MORE BIO-WARFARE NEWS… “Winter Vomiting Disease”: The Other Big Winter Bug To Watch Out For!

BIO ATTACK:
PIGEON EATS HUMAN’S FLU VOMIT,
SPREADING THE DISEASE FURTHER!

pigeon eats flu vomit